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Mini-Debate: Crying During Sex – Good, Bad, Weird … Huh?

I’m not sure how it came up exactly (seriously!), but this weekend Code Name TK & I were discussing the enigmatic “girls crying during sex” phenom, which he found “weird.”  I actually wrote an entire article about it for COED magazine back in ‘05, but haven’t brought it up much since (although I’ve definitely cried a few times in that interim!).

What do you think??  Email me – julia@nonsociety.com

COED MAGAZINE
APRIL 2005
BY JULIA ALLISON

Ask any man about women crying during sex and you’ll get a strange reaction.

First, there’s The Blank Stare – they have no idea what [read more...]

Many women feel that the potential of the man they are seeing is a matter of life or death. Instead of having fun playing with him (like a child with a favorite playmate), they evaluate his potential as a father. They situate any future relationship squarely in the realm of adulthood. The rest of their lives is at stake.

Many women feel that the potential of the man they are seeing is a matter of life or death. Instead of having fun playing with him (like a child with a favorite playmate), they evaluate his potential as a father. They situate any future relationship squarely in the realm of adulthood. The rest of their lives is at stake.

I don’t know who wrote this, but I agree with it wholeheartedly.

Just enjoy dating.  Don’t take it so damn seriously!  In other words: stop imagining the next 50 years with this dude.  Focus on the next 50 minutes.

Reader Email: "you’re not officially dating until you’re Facebook official!"

From: MK
Date: July 22, 2009 10:14:40 AM EDT
To: julia@nonsociety.com
Subject: multi media dos and dont’s


Hi Julia,

I’m a reader of your blog and just came across your entry about multimedia dos and dont’s. Forgive me if this is rushed; I have to leave for work in 10 minutes!
Girls: Don’t chase boys via multimedia. I know sending a simple text is more informal than a phone call and it may seem more acceptable for girls to do, and maybe to a degree it is. But if the guy takes forever to respond or doesn’t respond at all, he might just not be [read more...]



Multi-Media Dating Dos & Don’ts – for the Facebook Generation

I’m working on a piece about general rules of thumb for courtship over new technology (text, twitter, IM, email, facebook).  We had a fun little twitter discussion going tonight, but I’m open to any reader suggestions (or stories, ha) up until midday Wednesday!

Email me: Julia@NonSociety.com

xo

The title of this article in the Village Voice was Kevin Smith’s answer to my question.

The title of this article in the Village Voice was Kevin Smith’s answer to my question.

“And when a pretty girl in a pink dress with matching pink stilettos, pink bra, pink fingernail polish, and a pink iPhone asked, on behalf of Time Out, whether Smith had any dating advice, he replied, “Well, the first time I fucked my wife I had an open sore on my cock.” Smith’s wife and mom were sitting near one another in the third row.”

I’m just curious to know how they deduced I was wearing a pink bra!?! (I was, indeed.)



First Date Postmortem!

So … I don’t usually do this, but I got the okay (actually, although he was fine with me sharing them, I’m going to keep his name and visage off, just in case.  When it comes to the internet, I’ve learned that people don’t always know what they’re getting themselves into, and I’d rather error on the side of caution.)

Anyway!  As those of you who read this little site know, I’ve been going on a lot of dates recently – at least one or two a week, when I’m in town.  Most of [read more...]



Date outfit is black tights, black booties, and a black dress with this huge collar which Mary loves.  I just can’t be bothered to figure out anything else!  Besides, he wanted to meet in the LES, so I figure he likes girls in all black ;) hahaha

THE DO’S AND DON’TS OF TEXTING



THE DO’S AND DON’TS OF TEXTING
TIME OUT NEW YORK
JANUARY 15-20, 2009
BY JULIA ALLISON
 

“Sexxx tonight? yes ot no?” That’s an actual text received by Alexa, 28. Unsurprisingly, she went with the latter option.

Sure, everyone makes mistakes, but the art of woo-texting requires finesse. No matter the medium, typos, jargon and lingo are major turnoffs. Trying to get me to come over? Don’t spell cool with a k, k?

Sound harsh? Whatever. This is Manhattan, people. The land of the OBO (“or better offer”). The city of BBD (“bigger, better deals”). Bottom line: Get your texting game straight. (Not str8.)

Text [read more...]



Read my column on BAD TEXT over HERE at Time Out New York.com

Here’s a tease to get you going …

Time Out New York: Sex & Dating
Bad Textiquette by Julia Allison
Issue 694: January 15-21, 2009

“sexxx tonight? yes ot no?”

That would be an ACTUAL TEXT received by marketing account manager Alexa, 28.  Perhaps unsurprisingly, she went with the latter option.

So many texts, so little texiquette – something I discovered recently, when a man who was attempting – badly – to woo me, sent me the following SMS:

“Would luv 2 but meet n friends 4 [read more...]



A year ago, I was sitting at this exact same seat (at the counter in my parents’ kitchen) playing Apologize over and over (uh, and not randomly. Listen to the lyrics).  Despite insistences that I was “fine, no really I’m fine. I’M GREAT!”, the truth is, I wasn’t fine.  I was far, far, far from fine.

What a difference a year – and two amazing women – makes.  I thought about this when I received the following email from a distraught reader:

From: [redacted]
Date: December 17, 2008 7:38:17 AM EST
To: Julia Allison
Subject: on a bus [read more...]