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INTERVIEW: Done With Being Single – Experts Reveal Their Secrets To Finding & Keeping Love

Done with Being Single

Done With Being Single – Experts Reveal Secrets To Finding & Keeping Love
Interview with Kavita Patel
September 2012
New York City

PATEL: So, you wrote this beautiful article for Elle magazine called the Guinea Pig of Love: Lessons Learned and please [directs to viewer] check that out, Google it, read it.  [To Julia] So, you have been dating for a decade, can you tell us a little about that?

ALLISON:  Actually, a little bit over a decade. I had my first date when I was fourteen and I am thirty-one now — so, that’s a lot [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: LESSONS LEARNED

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: LESSONS LEARNED
ELLE
AUGUST 7, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON 

And so my chapter as a Guinea Pig of Love comes to a close. (Spoiler! This chapter has a happy ending).

For me, this moment is a long time coming, a process that started when I was twenty-one years old, a junior at Georgetown, when I made the choice that would change the rest of my life: to write a column about dating.

They say you teach what you yourself need to learn.  Perhaps I knew then (subconsciously) that I didn’t have [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE PLEASURE CAMP

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE PLEASURE CAMP
ELLE
JULY 23, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON 

I grew up going to camp: sailing camp, ballet camp, Canadian canoe camp, even debate camp.  But I’ve never attended Pleasure Camp…until now.

I’m on the floor, cross-legged on a yoga mat, surrounded by 35 other women, mostly a decade to three older that me, listening to a very beautiful, very dynamic blonde in a tight red bandage minidress tell me to visualize straddling a horse.  “Inhale deeply, breathe in and out” she purrs.  “Feel the creature beneath you. Up, down, [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE MIND ARCHITECT

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE EXPERIMENT #4: MIND ARCHITECT
ELLE
JULY 17, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON 

“PROMMMM!”

I’m in a twelve-year-old powder blue strapless floor-length tulle prom dress, screaming out of the sunroof a stretch limo with an enthusiastic but somewhat perplexed man in a gray tuxedo with matching blue cummerbund.  It is not your conventional first date, but I’m not your conventional girl.

Why prom? Oh, hell, who knows? Why do some people love bowling, and others enjoy ant farms?  Why do some people appreciate opera and others get off on NASCAR?  Whatever makes you happy!  [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE WITCHES

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE EXPERIMENT #3: THE WITCHES
ELLE
JULY 11, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON

As it turns out, I’m the kind of girl who believes in witches.

When I first started this series, in a last-ditch attempt to reverse 15 years of Titanic-like relationship patterns, I promised myself I would avoid the advice-givers I had hoovered into my brain for years (No more “He’s Just Not That Into You” or “The Rules”), as clearly – that s–t hasn’t worked – and instead consult with unorthodox experts. In fact, the more eccentric, the better!

I [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE LOVE COACH

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE EXPERIMENT #2: THE LOVE COACH
ELLE
JULY 3, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON

I’m on a first date with a fellow named William, and I don’t feel like myself.  I’m not laughing, I’m not leaning forward eagerly, I’m not lobbing question after question at him like an overzealous headhunter.

My love coach, Annie Lalla, has told me to stop with all that already, and along with it, get rid of the deference, the modesty (both real and false), the praise, and the stock conversation topics.  Awesome. Pretty much everything I do – [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE TAROT CARD READER

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE EXPERIMENT #1: THE TAROT CARD READER
ELLE
JUNE 25, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON 

“Clairvoyant … intuitive … accurate” reads the ellipsis laden epithet on tarot card reader Jackie Turner’s no-frills website.

I’ve come here to meet her at the LA bakery in which she works (more on that later) on a mild November day at the behest of my editor, Keith. “It’ll be good for you …” he trails off, glancing down, but I know what he means: “You need serious help, lady.”

And I do. The hamster wheel [read more...]

GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE RELATIONSHIP REVELATION

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GUINEA PIG OF LOVE: THE RELATIONSHIP REVELATION
ELLE
JUNE 18, 2012
BY JULIA ALLISON

I’m 31.  I’ve just moved to Los Angeles from a 422-square foot studio in Manhattan’s Hell’s Kitchen.  And despite spending seven out of the last ten years writing about dating, I’m single. I’ve been tottering on the verge of a not-quite-full-blown anxiety attack for the past few years, staving it off with post-breakup ashram visits (upstate New York, not India), somewhat useful attempts at alternative therapy (ask me about the guy who took me through a weekend of “energy work” and Tony [read more...]

Long-winded Late Night Life Update, powered by Chocolate ;)

I’m starting to suspect that the Heisenberg uncertainty principle in physics – which “holds that the act of measuring a property of a particle alters that property” – might apply to life as well.

In other words, measuring your life (read: talking/writing about it) irrevocably alters it.  And because my life is in total flux right now, I’ve more or less shied away from doing much measurement at all.

But since I’m about to embark upon the semi-annual week of chaos, I wanted to take this last night of quiet to fill you in on a few things – [read more...]

Rarely is a YouTube comment worth noting, but this one is the exception: Grover: What kind of people can you love?Little Boy: Any kind! I think the modern world could learn a lot from this.